Hello. [The Entrance]

Flora, upon deciding that she wanted to interview someone, and knowing that I could not come up with much to write here, decided to interview me for my introduction to this blog.

Flora says: So, Larry, please tell us some basics about yourself. You know, where you live, where you were born, how old you are, your interests, all that jazz.

Larry Griffin says: Okay, will do. I was born on February 2nd, 1991 in Florida, USA. I was the last person born on the busiest day of this brand new hospital - Arnold Palmer's, for whoever is in the area - and I was the first child ever to live in my current residence, which was basically an exclusively old folks' home. In my spare time, I write, exercise, read or watch movies. I also like long walks on the beach and romantic dinners by candlelight with a pretty lady.

Flora says: Okay so, why were you living in an old folks' home?

Larry Griffin says: Because that is where we lived, I guess.

Flora says: Well, I can just as easily say my family lived in a shit house when we came to Canada because that is where we lived, but it is because we were poor refugees that pretty much just came there. So, I'm sure there must be some reason why you ended up living in an old folks' home

Larry Griffin says: Well, really, there isn't one, aside from the fact that that's where my parents chose to live, perhaps for the fact that they just got a good deal, or that it is a safe place. As I've grown up, I've seen that there are barely any crimes here at all, and that it's easy to be able to walk freely in the streets without trouble. I think this might be a problem when I don't live here anymore.

Flora says: Why do you think there's so little crime where you lived? Also, you said you were the first child to ever live in your current residence. Do you have any brothers or sisters, or are you an only child?

Larry Griffin says: There is no crime here because it is a closed off gate community. I am the first child in my family. I do have a younger sister though.

Flora says: Okay, well you seem to like reviewing music a lot, and you seem to like music in general, a lot more than the average population. What is it about music that is so intriguing to you?

Larry Griffin says: I don't think I do so much, these days. I have been busier and more distracted with other things, as well as listening to some different stuff I haven't tried before. I review music because that's how I am, critical of mostly everything.

Flora says: Why do you find yourself to be "critical of mostly everything"? What aren't you so critical about?

Larry Griffin says: That's just how I am. I find that it lets me enjoy the good things in life more, if I can pick out what isn't so good.

Larry Griffin says: I'm not critical about...well, really, I don't know. I'm not too picky about movies a lot of the time, as is evidenced in my usually consistent ratings.

Flora says: Then what is your favourite movie, and why?

Larry Griffin says: Pulp Fiction, simply because it's very enjoyable and charming, if you will.

Flora says: Alrighty. Well, a writer always has his/her/whatever's starting point, and a good number of times, they regret their works made at this stage of their writing career. Do you have any regrets as a writer? Why?

Larry Griffin says: I don't think so, regrets as a writer...it strikes me as pretty stupid, frankly. Everyone has their starting points, and if you're ashamed of them or regret them, then it shows a good deal of insecurity on your part. Now, I'm not saying you have to like your past works so well, or that you can't be critical of them, but there's no need to be ashamed of them. Everyone has their building blocks.

Flora says: What are your "styles of writing"? And by styles of writing, I mean, for example... mine are politics, comedy, song-writing - lyrics and instrumentals, and stuff about the news.

Larry Griffin says: Interesting, interesting. I have dabbled in many genres as I've practiced writing, from superheroes to fantasy/action, to horror and mystery...but I only really got serious about it earlier this year, while writing a black comedy/satire called Around the Bend.

Since then, I have developed ideas for other stories along the same lines, mostly inspired by Chuck Palahniuk, author of Fight Club and Lullaby, among others. I am attracted mainly to the weirdness and eccentricity of it, while the stories themselves remain serious when you get past the weirdness.

I am also quite inspired by humor/comedy writer Carl Hiaasen, who writes books about Florida and satirizes the odd culture of the place. Interesting reads.

I am also influenced by more "nerdy" things, although I have never cared about such terminology, like comic books or B horror films.

The one road block I have is the fact that I am pretty much devoid of any real cultural knowledge, having never traveled outside of my native Florida, and barely even anywhere in the state itself. This hinders me, but I get by.

Flora says: I feel dumb, I don't know of any of those people (I'm a Time Magazine and news type, FUCK BOOKS! )

Tell me about your black comedy, Around the Bend

Larry Griffin says: Haha, do not feel dumb, I don't know many of the "popular" authors myself. I just discover as I go at my own pace.

Larry Griffin says: Around the Bend is, as I imagine would be written on the book jacket, "a high-octane, sex-crazed romp through the black curtain of normalcy." It revolves around a fireman who is generally tired of his life. He is a failed writer, lacking any creativity to make a real story, and he likes to spend his time by himself, reading and keeping up with his taxes, in his large, three story home, in which he lives alone.

One day, he decides to run into a fire alone to try and save a young girl who is trapped inside.

He falls to the ground and loses consciousness, later awoken in a hospital, saved by a colorful, energetic pimp who runs a skin club on the edges of the city. He becomes friends with the pimp, and the story is a recount of the events that lead to his current position, sitting on Death Row, spiced up with doses of black humor and bloody action.

Flora says: That's pretty fucking good. Better than the stuff I've been coming up with lately... you should put your comedy on DeviantArt, they have a thing where you can save text.... but anyhow.. what are your biggest inspirations to write?

Larry Griffin says: On Deviant Art? I don't think so

My biggest inspirations? Reading books, that is the secret to it. Just reading fills me with creativity and ideas to write.

Flora says: What is your favourite book?

Larry Griffin says: I'd say The Stand by Stephen King, bit of an odd choice, but then again I never had the most amazing tastes.

I merely write for those like myself, not those looking for literary masterworks.

I suppose another inspiration of mine was Quentin Tarantino's movies, actually, because they are just cool, despite often messy and silly. They are representations of what the man wants to see on film, and my writing is the same in that respect, except for paper, you get the idea.

Flora says: Fuck, I don't know what else to ask. Well, looks like we're done! Welcome to the team.

A Change of Heart

Meet Chris Johnston, a 49-year-old ex Minister who now works as a Loan Officer in the banking industry. We had an interesting interview on his move from faithful to faithless.

Hello, Chris Johnston! I believe you mentioned at some point that you were a minister for 15 years, but suddenly had a change of heart and turned to Atheism. Why did you pick Atheism over Christianity?

Wow, let's jump right in! Okay! Honestly, it's not like I put Christianity on one side and measured it against Atheism. The two are not in that kind of competition. And it was hardly sudden.

I became a Christian at the age of 14, and "answered the call to preach" at 15. It was one way to be different, to get some attention for a geeky, skinny kid. My first sermon took hours to prepare and the whole thing lasted ten minutes! I spent the next few years preparing for the ministry. I started out as a Southern Baptist (largest protestant denomination in the country at that time) but switched to independent Baptist after my first year of college. That meant I was no longer affiliated with Southern Baptists, but was a member of a church that was very loosely associated through a common string of doctrines. This was extremely fundamentalistic. In fact, to us, Jerry Falwell was quite a compromiser, the worst insult you could give to another Christian, in our eyes!

I spent some time at a now-defunct bible "college" in Tennessee where I met my first wife. In time we had two children, I finally graduated from an accredited college with a bachelor's degree in Theology and a minor in history. During that time I pastored a rural Mississippi church. As it turned out, the church members were so bigoted, they not only didn't want blacks, they also didn't want poor whites!

Following my graduation, I matriculated at a Southern Baptist seminary. About one year into my accelerated program, I realized I was in the wrong line of work. Somehow they were all talking about a relationship with Jesus as if it were actually a personal friendship, and I realized that I had never had that and didn't even know how it worked. I had been seeking for years for a deeper emotional and spiritual understanding, but somehow, there were no answers to prayer.

All this conflict gave me a great deal of difficulty with my personal life, so my wife took the kids home to momma and daddy, and we eventually divorced.

I continued as a seeker for some time, trying to find what I felt I had missed out on. I eventually discovered "Atlas Shrugged," by Ayn Rand. This led me to begin thinking about the nature of belief, faith, and evidence.

I realized that since 95% of the worlds' Christian church members actually live their daily lives as if there were no god, I would stop living the lie. I finally fully embraced atheism just two or three years ago, and came out in the last year or two.

How was it a way to get attention? Did you feel alone, and decided that, by becoming Christian, you'd at least have God to "keep you company"?
Tell us more about how you feel about Jerry Falwell, please.
How are "95% of the worlds' Christian church members actually live their daily lives as if there were no god"?

Good questions.
I was a geeky high schooler, 6'1" and 150 lbs, and didn't really fit in, in a small town where I had not been born. I had no athletic ability and our school was so small there was really only the "in" crowd and the hoodlums.

So my best friend and I were the "preacher boys," which got a lot of attention from the church and the older crowd. And no, it really had nothing to do with loneliness, I never really felt lonely growing up.

I didn't care much for Falwell and his "silent majority." This had more to do with what we considered his "doctrinal weakness" than anything else. We were more in the Bob Jones University crowd, although the "uppercrust" pretensions of that place were a little offputting for country boys who liked country and bluegrass music.

With time, I came to appreciate Falwell and others for what they are (were). Evangelicals who believe that it was their job to bring about Christian law. They pushed Scientific Creationism (that was its name in those days, not ID) and wanted to elect their kind of Christians to school boards and local, state, and national office. Eventually Falwell's popularity faded and I hadn't thought about him for years by the time he assumed room temperature.

Most Christians live their lives as if God did not exist. How else can you explain the response to Matthew 6?

25"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? 26Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life[b]?
28"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' 32For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

And yet Christians go about their lives working, saving, paying for health insurance, etc. because it's STUPID NOT TO! It is against human life to take no thought for tomorrow, and this is what the Bible is teaching here.

There are a great many more passages that come to mind. Remember how Jesus is reported to have said things like "turn the other cheek," and "blessed are the meek?" When was the last time you went on a Christian web forum and identified yourself as a satisfied atheist? Lots of love there, usually about the time they realize they cannot win the argument!

Certain In-Laws who shall remain nameless are a good case in point. They love their church. They take discipleship classes. She fills in on piano. He teaches Sunday School. If we go to the lake to visit with them, it's always us disrespecting them because we won't go to church with the. In fact, you could say they never miss a Sunday.

Unless the Chiefs are in town (season tickets). Or they have a trip somewhere. Then they are blissfully unaware that churches exist and are in session on Sunday morning! Is it just me, or is something missing here?

This is a fun thing. It feels good to say some of these things. I just tried to access your blog, though, and got an error message. Let me know when you start posting some of it.

Good answers, Chris.

What is Falwell's "silent majority" and "doctrinal weakness," in your opinion? What's the "Bob Jones University crowd"? How do you feel about Scientific Creationism being pushed into schools?

I'd also like to add something. Would you say that the lack of dedication to Christianity on the part of Christians was a comparatively strong influencing factor in your move to Atheism, or was it comparatively minor as opposed to other factors?

Wow, did I say "silent majority?" That was a term coined by Richard Nixon in a speech from Novermber 3, 1969 at the height of the Watergate scandal.

What I meant to say, was "Moral Majority," an evangelical-leaning-toward-fundamentalist political organ founded by Jerry Falwell in 1979. Wikipedia has an excellent article concerning the Moral Majority. We were of a stricter stripe, doctrinally speaking, than Falwell's church. We thought he was a "compromiser," the worst thing our crowd could ever call someone who was, in truth, as close to us doctrinally as anyone could be. However, we were a little closer to "Hardshell" baptists than anything. A Hardshell Baptist is one who believes in Calvinist predestination, that God's plan all along was to create the world and everything in it, and plan from the beginning to redeem only his chosen few. Today I recoil at this idea of a god more than almost any other. It makes him seem like a petulant child as well as a sadistic thug.

Had I continued in that type of church, I shudder to think what may have happened. We were close to endorsing abortion provider murders, clinic bombings, and the like. In those days, a very slick and well-done video series was making the rounds: Francis Schaffer's "How Shall We Then Live?" He popularized the notion that abortion was a new Holocaust more terrible than the slaughter of six million Jews, not to mention millions of retarded, handicapped, homosexuals, and others.

Bob Jones University was founded in the 1920s by, of all people, an evangelist by the name of Bob Jones, Sr. Go figure! It's a fundamentalist institution which has added a veneer of classical culture. BJU (the University where you are likely to get a BJ but not tell anyone) graduates tend to have a condescending attitude toward graduates of other Christian schools, even fundamentalist ones. They liken themselves to Harvard. They look down on all manner of popular culture, including country and bluegrass music, preferring classical, etc.

Presidency of the university has passed to the fourth generation Jones under Stephen Jones, son of Bob Jones III. Of course god approves of this particular method of passing the mantle in order to ensure continuation of the legacy.

I'd rather think about it than feel about it. Feelings about it simply elevate emotionalism to the place that faith occupies in religionists. That being said, I am passionately against anyone attempting to appropriate a place akin to science for their mythology.

http://www.venganza.org/ is an excellent answer for the push to instill "Intelligent Design," (ID) which is "Scientific Creationism", which is the creation myth dressed up in scientific language. ID was being pushed in Kansas by the Kansas Board of Education. The method they were using was insidious. By redefining science, they hoped to make room for supernatural explanations for natural phenomena. The "Flying Spaghetti Monster" was an attempt to show how silly it was to take one supernatural explanation over any other. It has since become a cultural phenomenon, and you can see one of its posters at the top of my blog, http://faith-in-action.blogspot.com.

This was proven in court in the case of the Dover, PA school board. U.S. District Judge John E. Jones ruled that ID is not science and cannot be used in the public school. All of this is fascinating reading and should be required.

And I would say the lack of dedication on the part of Christians was simply an aggravating factor. I spent many years defying that trend, looking into mysticism, spending hour after hour praying for something more than I had experienced. I know now, that the prayers were never heard outside that room.

Speaking of Jerry Falwell and the Moral Majority, how do you feel about Pat Robertson's revival of the group under the name of the Moral Majority Coalition? How do you generally feel about Pat Robertson? Would you liken him to a terrorist such as Osama Bin Laden, like Ethical Atheist did, or not? Why?

Hmm... you said you were close to "endorsing abortion provider murders." I'm sure you meant "endorsing abortion-provided murders"? What'd you mean there?
Here's some things I'm going to assume about the BJU crowd, given the time and Christian standing:

Definitely an all-male university. Since they weren't allowed to have sex before marriage, that's why they'd commit homosexual activity "under the table," in reference to your BJ pun. They were tied up in the past, possibly with Gregorian music, and always deemed tradition to be better, even though they never gave modern music a chance.

Am I correct? Please tell me what I got wrong.

Anyway, back to the questions... can you give our readers an example of ID "preachings" dressed with science?

I think it's specious at best to lump Pat Robertson, who engages in offensive religious speech, with Osama bin Laden, who murders innocent men, women, and children in order to creat terror and achieve his political or religious aims. Do I think he would like to see a theocracy here in the U.S. under his own brand of Xianity? (Wow spell it like that and it sounds eerily like insanity) Of course he would. Would he stoop to terrorism to achieve it? Well, the man isn't stupid or crazy. Religiously, I believe he's about at the same level of fanaticism, except that Islam makes men like OBL heroes and the New Testament is a more passive document.

No, I meant what I said. At that time, killing an abortion providing doctor was being likened, in more extreme churches, to an act of defending the defenseless, where we would use lethal force to stop someone from raping a baby, for instance. It was a scary precipice.

Almost all of it. *Laughs* It's a co-ed christian university started in the 1920's by fundamentalists. Their hatred of folk, country, etc. is simply an affectation of culture. It's very off-putting. And the blowjob thingy has nothing to do with homosexuality. It's just that the culture is so very strict, it's easy to see where hypocrisy can creep in.

A Google search on "Intelligent Design" should yield plenty of instances.

So, Flora, I am enjoying this interview. I am curious to know more about you, too. I understand you are in high school in Toronto? And that you were born in Iraq?

What can you tell me about your life so far? Are you truly atheist? And I see a great deal of difficulty in your relationship with your father. Do you feel more free to resist since you live in Canada, instead of a Muslim country? And how has the tube of lip gloss thing gone? Did everything come out all right?

Can you give the readers a reason as to how it's not passive?
What do you mean by "an affectation of culture"? Do you mean a false hatred or dislike of sorts?
Seriously, Chris, that ID search almost made me throw up. Ramen!

Yup. Born in Iraq. No, I'm not taking school in Toronto, but very near there.
My life's going quite good. I'm working on a lot of social activist projects with a Christian service animator (believe me, she's a great lady), and a buddy of mine, who also happens to be named Chris. We're hoping to get our projects known on a global scale someday. He's really such a great guy, and he's only in 10th grade!
Yes, I am truly an Atheist. Funny thing is, people thought I'd be depressed after giving up my strong beliefs in God. But let me tell you, that was when my depression decreased on such a large scale. I've learned to live life to live, not to live life to hide. I can just be me, and go through life helping others without having to worry what's going to happen to me. And I can't wait to see the impact I have on other people's lives.
I do feel more able to resist. It wasn't about whether I'm a female anymore when we came to Canada - it was about the individual. Though women still have a path to walk here, it's way fucking better than being most places in the Middle East.
The lip gloss thing has gone well. Wow, I post everything about me at ATWKS, haha. But I thought it was funny and so I'd share it. But wow, it really was a drag. I don't want to go into details about HOW I managed to get it out.
And Chris, I'm really enjoying the interview too!

Modern terrorists take an active role in trying to achieve their aim. For the Islamist, I believe that aim is total Shari'a domination of the world.

Pat Robertson would like the same thing (except with his interpretation of the moral code, his brand of Xianity in charge) but would never stoop to blowing up innocent people to achieve his aim. I attribute that partly to the nature of the New Testament (even though he twists it when it suits him) but mostly to the secular society the United States has always had. We have always believed that we had to convince someone, not threaten them, to get them to truly convert.

The New Testament is a very passive book. In fact, it's pacifist. When jesus simply tells his followers to turn the other cheek, and pray for those who "despitefully" use them, it's obviously a pacifist book. How neoconservatives and the religious right make Jesus into some sort of warrior god is beyond me.

Funny, the differences between the teachings of Jesus (whose existence I tentatively stipulate as a holdover from so many years of indoctrination) and the teachings of the modern evangelica churches.

Jesus on public "righteousness"(Gospel of Matthew chapter 6):

1"Beware of practicing your righteousness before men (A)to be noticed by them; otherwise you have no reward with your Father who is in heaven.
2"So when you give to the poor, do not sound a trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, so that they (B)may be honored by men (C)Truly I say to you, they have their reward in full.
3"But when you give to the poor, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing,
4so that your giving will be in secret; and (D)your Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you.

Church practice: big deal about giving, huge deal about good works, everyone goes to church to see and be seen. Many churches preach about a success gospel that says if you are successful it is evidence God has blessed you.

Jesus on Prayer (Matt. 6):

5"When you pray, you are not to be like the hypocrites; for they love to (E)stand and pray in the synagogues and on the street corners (F)so that they may be seen by men (G)Truly I say to you, they have their reward in full.
6"But you, when you pray, (H)go into your inner room, close your door and pray to your Father who is in secret, and (I)your Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you.
7"And when you are praying, do not use meaningless repetition as the Gentiles do, for they suppose that they will be heard for their (J)many words.
8"So do not be like them; for (K)your Father knows what you need before you ask Him.

Church practice: oral prayers in public, prayers written down and read at public gatherings (including a recent Barack Obama gathering I attended)

Jesus on wealth (Matt. 6):

19"(Y)Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.
20"But store up for yourselves (Z)treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal;
21for (AA)where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Church practice: back to the success gospel, plus for instance the Roman Catholic church being the wealthiest nation (Vatican City-state) per capita in the world, amassing fortunes in gold, art, etc. looted from around the world (through the demanding of tribute from its churches and the looting of the new world gold in the 16th-20th centuries)

Finally, Jesus on the use of force (Matthew 5):

38"(AZ)You have heard that it was said, '(BA)AN EYE FOR AN EYE, AND A TOOTH FOR A TOOTH.'
39"But I say to you, do not resist an evil person; but (BB)whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also.
40"If anyone wants to sue you and take your [g]shirt, let him have your [h]coat also.
41"Whoever forces you to go one mile, go with him two.
42"(BC)Give to him who asks of you, and do not turn away from him who wants to borrow from you.
43"(BD)You have heard that it was said, '(BE)YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR (BF)and hate your enemy.'
44"But I say to you, (BG)love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,

Church practice: lawsuits, articles of incorporation, the preaching of armed conflict, even though Jesus specifically said a Xian should not defend themselves. Making Jesus to be some kind of avenging angel who leads armies on America's behalf. In this way many Xians are more rooted in the god of the Old Testament than in the New Testament.

What's the difference between the God of the Old Testament and that of the New Testament in your eyes?

Wow. Big question. I won't go into chapter and verse citations, but here are some high points.
In the Old Testament, he is an angry God, jealous and petulant about his followers' attentions. This is a basic cultural ideal from millenia ago, "Our God is better than your god." Many places in the OT, Yahweh is considered the best god, but the existence of other gods is not called into question. He smites unbelievers, conquers his enemies, and calls for wholesale slaughter of men, women, and children when conquering. This is still cited in evangelical churches as being a healthy thing for Israel.

Where God's power is wholesale in the OT (parting the Red Sea, making the sun stand still, flooding the earth, etc.), in the New Testament, his miracles are retail, through Jesus (healing the sick one at a time, making fish and loaves feed a multitude). One wonders why, if Jesus could do these things, he didn't just end suffering altogether.

Where the OT God is very similar to other gods of the time, i.e. warlike and with a great deal of human failings (anthropomorphism), the NT God is a "God of love." "God is love." In the NT, the claim is that Jesus paid for the sins of the entire world, including all in the past and everything going forward until the end of time. Kind of an odd deal. God makes the rules that we cannot keep, which makes us evil and sinful, then pays the price for us. Hmmm sounds like a gospel sermon but the oddity of it all just makes me wonder what I was ever thinking to be involved with it.

If it had to make sense or require evidence, it wouldn't be faith, would it?

Interesting answers.

Any last words for our readers?

I guess my final word would be an exhortation to reason. We must, in the final analysis, think for ourselves and make our own decisions. One great way to do this is to ask better questions. What if I haven't necessarily been taught the truth? What would happen if I changed my mind?

Demand evidence. Think it through. Make up your own mind.

Flora, thanks for the opportunity to vent!
Chris

Chris has a blog called Faith In Action and a website on bonsai.

The Roaming Buffalo

Meet Buffalo Brown, "a proud native son of the USA accepting the hospitality of Canada; a Nam Vet who is a capitalist, socialistic, Libertarian" who also describes himself as an Atheist and hedonist. He's the 2nd interviewee on ATWKS' interviews with me. Below, his answers are formatted in italics, and my questions in bold.

What state did you formerly live in the USA? How was your transition from said place to Manitoba, Quebec?
When did you become an Atheist, and why? Why did you realize yourself as a "hedonist"?

Please tell us about some of your experiences in Vietnam, seeing as you're a 'nam vet.

In your blogger profile, you wrote "above all else I value freedom. Freedom is a delicate flower that is difficult to cultivate and so very easy to destroy." Can you expand on this, regarding how you've seen freedom being cultivated and destroyed relevant to something that heavily impacted you?

You asked a few tough questions there, young lady.
1) My last state-side home was in Missouri - Kansas City to be exact. I have lived ever where from California to Massachusetts.
2) The transition to Manitoba is far from complete. I can only tell you that the summers are too short and the winters too long and cold. I hate cold.
3) The journey from believer to Atheist took a number of years to travel. After years of studying religion and philosophy, after years of thinking about what I had read, I found it impossible to believe in a deity. It wasn't a choice. One doesn't choose to believe or disbelieve.
4) I believe that life is about living. We truly live by experiencing all life has to offer - the pleasures, the pains, the sorrow, the joys, the work, the learning. That is the GP-rated version. 5) Vietnam was a life-altering experience. It was endless hours of hard work, lonliness and boredom juxtaposed with periods of mind numbing, adrenalin-charged danger. It is something that stays with you forever.
6) Unfortunately I don't see freedom being cultivated. I see it only being taken away. I believe very strongly that every adult should be free to do exactly what they want to do as long as it does not physically interfere with someone else enjoying those same freedoms.

Missouri sounds familiar. If you could describe it in 1 word, apart from home, what would it be and why?

I don't think of Missouri as home. I've lived in far too many places to consider any one of as my home.

Well I was asking you, sir, if you could describe Missouri in one word and why, hah.

I am well aware of that, ma'am. How do you describe the ever changing beauty of the Ozark Hills in one word? Have you ever sat on a bluff over looking the convergence of two very different rivers, one clear, shallow and fast moving and the other deep, slow and muddy, while a full summer moon casts its magic? How does one describe the beauty, the aromas, the kiss of a night breeze and the sounds of night creatures moving through the woods in one word. How does one adequately describe love with one word and one word only?

Well, there are broad terms you can use, but I sort of get ya. I tell you, if I had to describe my current town in 1 word, it would be quite hard, and not for positive reasons. *laughs*

One word descriptions are very limiting as the image that is conjured in the mind of the reader is often quite different from what the writer meant.

You're still getting adjusted to Manitoba, eh? What do you think of the culture and the people of Manitoba? How does it differ from that of your other homes, such as Missouri?

I don't judge all of Manitoba based on my observations of this small section where we live. It is a heavily Mennonite area. I have not been able to engage any of them in conversation. I get the impression that if you're not Mennonite you are not only an outsider, but for all intents and purposes you don't exist. I have never lived anywhere that I could not get people to talk to me.

What are some other things about Manitoba that really turn you off? And no, not in a sexual way. Though I highly doubt that a city would be able to sexually turn anyone on sexually, unless you were sadistic... sorry, I got caught in the moment there. Also, do you have anything good to say about Manitoba? Because if you do, do tell us.

This part of Manitoba is a very peaceful place. The threat level is virtually zero. I am not uncomfortable with leaving the house unlocked. I feel no need to have a pistol within easy reach. (I sent it home before I crossed the border. A good thing since they searched our saddlebags when we crossed.)
The medical system here seems to work fairly well. The cleanliness of the environment blows me away.
Other than the cold of winter and the lack of social contact it isn't a bad place.

What was the most significant piece that you've read which helped you build a strong lead toward Atheism?

It would have to be the Bible - specifically the King James version of the Bible.

Why was it specifically the King James version that impacted you in a negative manner?

That was the version of the bible we used. The outcome would have been the same if I had read a Catholic bible or any of the newer translations they offer now days.

I'll say, you've got some very interesting views on life. Must be the "with age comes wisdom factor." Hah, you must be OLD. Errr..... okay, let's get back to the questions.

Yes, I'm old. By your standards I'm ancient.

The wisdom factor that is supposed to come with age is highly overrated. More often than not that much vaunted wisdom translates into the knowledge that doing something you really want to do is going to hurt like hell.

So, in short, 'nam was like many moments of boredom, with intervals of life-threatening danger in between?

Yeah, kind of/sort of, but not exactly. It was what it was. It isn't something I'm terribly comfortable talking about.

Okay, if talking about 'nam makes you this uncomfortable, some things must have shocked you horribly. I promise not to talk about 'nam again in this interview.

There are things about the Nam that do cause an emotional reaction when I think or talk about them. More importantly, unless a person has been to war they have a tendancy to judge based on their particular sense of reality which has been cultivated by their culture, the movies they watch and the books or texts they read. A couple of years ago I was listening to an extremely liberal talk show down home. The moderator, one of those I'm so damned smart folk, was making statements about combat and the military that were absolutely wrong. I called in and told her a truth. (No, I didn't get ugly or smart.) She cut me off and told her listeners that I need to check into a mental ward. Her words to me aren't the issue. I told her an absolute truth. Her reality made her dismiss it without thought.
That's life though. Everyone judges through the filters of their own existence. More often than not their existences are extremely narrow.

Referring to your "Nam experience".... That's really true. For example, most people who were denying the Armenian genocide of 1915 didn't look at the obvious effects of the incident. Some who even recognized the situation took it for nothing.
That's a very common thing. The writers of history rarely lived it, have only second and third hand knowledge of it, and filter it through the supposed reality of their experience. No two people see something the same way. Ask any cop that questions witnesses to an accident or a crime.

That last thing you said about being able to be free without restricting anyone else's freedom reminds me of something my brother said about freedom of health. He made a comparison of fat people to smokers. He said that fat people are an endangerment to society, so why are they more socially acceptable than smokers? I would've said that it's because one person's weight doesn't affect anyone else's health, and smoking affects other people's health, but there has been some evidence that fat people, because of their high influential power within their kids at a young age, make their kids imitate their bad eating habits. How do you feel about all this?

Well, I'm fat and I smoke and, though admitedly biased, I think your brother is wrong for a lot of reasons. Check this out.

Of course parents influence their children. Peers influence peers. Entertainment icons influence fans. Poverty breeds improper nutrition and poor eating habits. Ignorance breeds poor eating habits. Two job families breed poor eating habits. Junk food and candy company advertising promotes poor eating habits. There is a lot more that I could say about both weight and smoking. It is all pretty futile though. It seems to be an unfortunate truth that there is a concentrated effort to engineer society into a place where individuality, free thought and simple freedom doesn't exist. It makes me almost happy that I am no longer young.

Thanks for the interview, Buffalo!

My pleasure, Flora. Thanks for asking.

The camera loves Bianca

This is the first official interview being posted onto the ATWKS website, and is the first in a series. Our subject today is Bianca Crudo, a fifteen-year-0ld with the aspiration to become a great actress.

First off, talk about some general things about yourself.

Hola! I'm Bianca, and I'm fifteen. I am 5'1'', so no one can call me a midget. I love dancing and singing, but my true passion is acting. I lived in Canada until I was ten, and while I was there, I was in a feature film called Julie Walking Home as one of the leads. I was Julie's Daughter. I was in it with Miranda Otto (Princess Eowyn [from the Lord of the Rings]) and William Fichtner (Prison Break, Contact, Perfect Storm), and it was by far one of the best experiences of my life. At 10, my dad got promoted, so we moved to Connecticut. I am still trying to persuade my parents to bring me acting, but it is an on going battle.

Just random stats: [my] birthday [is] April 2nd, 1992, [I] Like Brown Hair and Hazel eyes, I love my nose, I hate running shoes, I have an unnatural obsession with the OC, and most of the shows I watch are reality television. People have asked me if I am bulimic before, and I find that incredibly insulting (I weigh 88 pounds).

Bianca, please tell our readers more about your acting experiences! For example, some other movies you've been in, and some wonderful people you've met during the filming of said movies, or because of those movies.

Was there any particular movie that made you think, "This is why I want to be an actress"? If so, which one? And what actions have you considered taking to get back into acting?

Well, my mom knew that I was destined to become an actress since I was little. I craved for the attention of the video camera. So one day, my mom brought me in to see an agent and they loved me. So I started auditioning!

On my first audition, I got stand by (so on the rare occasion that the person who got the job can't do it, I will) and that upset me. The next thing my mom told me is something I will always remember "it doesn't mean you weren't good enough, it just means you weren't right for what they were looking for". I kept that in mind as I continued auditions, and I booked my second job! I was in a royal canadian mint commercial.

After that, I did 2 more commercials: a healthcare commericial (I was a boy's little sister, and sat there and played game boy for almost the entire time), and then I was in a 'hop along Katie' commercial. In between those, I auditioned for 'Don't Say A Word' with Michael Douglas, but didn't get the part.

Finally, I auditioned for 'Julie Walking Home'. We were on vacation in Quebec when we got the call that I was called back! We went home, and I actually auditioned with the boy who ended up playing my twin. Filming Julie Walking Home was an amazing experience. I was taken out of school for a month (I got a tutor) and then I went to Halifax, Nova Scotia and stayed in a 5 star hotel for filming! If anyone watches Naturally Sadie, the boy who plays Rain Papadakis was in the movie with me. *Smiles*

The Director was Agneizka Holland, who directed The Secret Garden. The plot of the movie is that my dad cheats on my mom, my brother gets cancer, and he is allergic to the chemo. So he is brought by Miranda Otto (our mom) to Poland to see a healer; their last hope. I don't want to give away the ending. *Laughs*

After filming the movie was when my career started to take a turn for the better. I filmed a capital one commericial, but it got shelved. *Frown* After filming that commericial, we moved to Connecticut, where I wasn't allowed to act until I was an American citizen. I am one now, and now I am arguing about going into the city. Both of my brothers are wrestling almost every night after school, and my mom doesn't want to abandon them so she can drive me into NY for auditions. So currently, I am trying everything I can to persuade her just to try it out.

A funny tidbit: I hated the movie when I saw it because I knew every single line and I still haven't seen the entire movie *Smiles*... there is a sex scene that my mom made me close my eyes for when I saw it at the age of 10 (I went to the Toronto Film Festival!), and then I haven't really been interested in watching it since (Unless people force me too ) *Smiles*. PS Sometimes it is on the sundance channel!
Any other questions?

Bianca, do you still believe your mother was right when she thought that you were destined to become an actress? Do you believe it is your destiny?

Have you considered going to a university or college that has a program that can further you on your path to becoming a well-established actress?

I think she was right. Whenever anyone asks me what I want to do, I always say "act." What frustrates me about her is the fact that she still won't try out the New York scene. I know it will take up a lot of time, but I am just asking her to try it!

And of course I have [considered going to a program for acting]! I have also been looking into a theater major, so currently my top choices are: Michigan, Juliard, and Ithica. However, my parents are bribing me with a new car or a downpayment on a house to go back to Canada for college. So if I go back there, I would look at going to Ryerson.

What are you looking most forward to taking an acting part in the future? Commercials, movies, broadway? Pick one!

Movies, definitely. Since I have done them all, I can safely say that movies are the most fun. On broadway, you have to portray a character, but all characters have to be larger than life, which is a LOT easier than trying to be real and true to the person. You also get to meet all kinds of different and talented people.

Ahh, I see.

I once heard the phrase, "in order to be a good actor, you must be a good liar." How do you feel about this?

I AGREE TOTALLY. *Laughs* I laughed when you said that because I have a funny story.
At one point, I auditioned for a discovery kids television show called 'The Adventures of Bug Boy'. I was auditioning for Bug Boy's sidekick. So I did a really good audition, and then at the end they asked me if I liked bugs. I said I hated them, and then never got a call back *Smiles*

I think you have to be a liar to some point because people are analyzing your every move, and in a sense, actors are there to please people. Does that make sense?

Before we finish up this session, I have just one more question: what does acting mean to you?

Acting means everything for me: a job, a lifestyle, a passion, love and everything else. I can only see myself being an actress, and I will do whatever it takes to make that dream become a reality. I don't think that people really understand why I love acting so much. It is kind of like TeenVogue. You just get hooked, and no matter when you say enough is enough, you keep coming back.

Thank-you for the interesting session, and I wish you good luck on the road to becoming a great actress!

Thanks so much! *Smiles*

Bianca Crudo can be found in Julie Walking Home, as she said. To learn more about the movie, click here.